Saturday, November 5, 2011

Good Old Days


All these things happened before.
 
Gorillas got drunk


Babies smoked pipes and/or solved mysteries


People rode REAL bikes


You could play piano in bed


Everyone was using shotguns


Dogs played mandolin


Whiskey vending machines existed


A child's first toy was a saw


You could play soccer against a panda


Baseball players drank and smoked in the dugout


People actually wanted to be the “Donut Queen”


Lions made great pets


Bears were made into chairs


Zebras pulled carriages


Cheetahs also made great pets


Lions rode shotgun


Tattoos were way more bad-ass


Monkeys played lounge music for puppies


Dogs could watch a movie


People did snuff


Little girls on rollerskates were incredibly intimidating


You could settle the score against a bear in the ring


Dogs smoked pipes and presumably joined the army


Lobsters made great pets too


Cats hung out in spaghetti


Puppies hung out in soldiers' pockets


Or better yet, Cary Grant.
Doctors looked like serial killers


Halloween was actually terrifying


Everyone looked cool with an eyepatch


This happened


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