Friday, February 10, 2012

Animals Trying to Be Human


These animals look as if they want to join the human race, but we’re not fooled. See what some animals will do to fit in with us bipeds.


Rabbits Who Think They Are Uptight Schoolteachers


Rabbits who think they are uptight schoolteachers can be found throughout the northern United States. They are distinguishable by their delicate purple sweater vests and their prim, disapproving facial expressions. If you find one, be sure to tuck in your shirt.

Bears Who Think They Are Hailing A Cab


Bears who think they are hailing a cab are common in areas with poor or limited public transportation. They are harmless to most humans except cab drivers.

Huskies Who Think They Are Intellectuals


Huskies who think they are intellectuals are most commonly seen in quiet reading rooms or alcoves with their furry little noses buried in a book. Once they reach adulthood most huskies who think they are intellectuals begin working on an obscure doctoral thesis that they will tragically never finish to their satisfaction.

Bears Who Think They Are At Some Kind Of A Picnic


Bears who think they are at some kind of a picnic can be found wherever there are picnic tables, waiting patiently for potato salad and cold quiche.

Cats Who Think They Are Reckless Drivers

If you see a cat who thinks he is a reckless driver, pull over to the side of the road and alert the local veterinary traffic police.

Teacup Pigs Who Think They Are At Prep School


Mostly native to New England and surrounding areas, teacup pigs who think they are at prep school are known for their delicate little snouts and their elitist attitudes.

Cats Who Think They Are British Schoolboys From The '50s

This one is called Reginald.
Cats Who Think They Are Couch Potatoes
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Most felines in North America think that they are couch potatoes, but not all of them have such a remarkable affinity for Lifetime Original Movies and Court TV.

Dogs Who Think They Are Your Secretary

Their air of competence and official demeanor makes these dogs fit in very naturally in an office setting, but they cannot usually be trusted with things like "tasks" or "work."

Foxes Who Think They Are At An Amusement Park

Foxes who think they are at an amusement park are very concerned about your work/life balance.

Cats Who Think They Are At A Drive-Thru

These felines are primarily distinguishable by their persistent ordering style and their indifference to condiments.

Polar Bears Who Think They Are Waving Goodbye

Something of a tragic animal, polar bears who think they are waving goodbye are forever in a state of flux. In a very real sense, they are achingly aware of the passing of all things. You should definitely wave back at them.

Cats Who Think They Have Seen A Ghost

Cats who think they have seen a ghost are by nature superstitious animals, but they also have a direct line to the other side, so they should be taken very seriously indeed.

Dogs Who Think They Are, Like, Super Chill Bros

Dogs who think they are, like, super chill bros should be approached with caution and, for good measure, a six pack.

Rats Who Think They Are Early 19th Century Housewives

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single rodent in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.

Chinchillas Who Think They Are At A Birthday Party

The distinguishing characteristics of these crepuscular rodents, of the family Chinchillidae, is that the little hats they wear are simply too precious for words.

Cats Who Think They Are Going For An Afternoon Stroll

Mostly native to the British Isles, these cats are generally domestic shorthairs and their strolls are generally post-prandial.

Owls Who Think They Are Picnicking In The Rain

Owls who think they are picnicking in the rain also think that they are hilarious.

Cats Who Think They Are Extremely Disappointed In You

For as long as these animals have been known, naturalists have been at a loss to explain the scientific reasons behind their severe facial expressions and implacable body language. The prevailing theory is that these idiosyncratic physical features are a result of the fact that you have let them down for the last time.

Cats Who Think They Are At Some Kind Of A Holiday Camp

While all domesticated cats think, on one level, that they are at some kind of a holiday camp, this sub-species is determined to damn-well make the most of it.

Cats Who Think They Are Getting Dressed For Work

Cats who think they are getting dressed for work can generally be found listening halfheartedly to morning radio and promising themselves that they are going to start going to bed earlier in future.

Squirrels Who Think They Are Having A Nice Day At The Beach

Most people don't know that squirrels are rodents and that these squirrels in particular are rodents with a very strong relaxation drive.

Cats Who Think They Are Angrily Demanding Service At A Restaurant

These felines are known for their sharp retractable claws and their paltry, insulting tips.

Bulldogs Who Think They Are Barflies

These domestic dogs are distinguished by the thick folds of skin on their brows, which are the result of worrying about whether they should have ordered that third pint on a school night.

Cats Who Think They Are Extremely Successful Businessmen

Only about 1% of cats fall into this category.